For a baseball hitter, 1-for-3 ain’t too shabby; in fact, it’s appealing abuse good. But for an A-list Hollywood actress, one acceptable account out of the aftermost three signals a bit of a slump. No account for anxiety yet, Anne Hathaway, but to digest a admonishing from Liv (Kate Hudson), your best friend-turned-arch nemesis in the lame, inane comedy, ‘Bride Wars,’ your career bigger watch it. After an Oscar-nominated about-face in ‘Rachel Getting Married’, you chose a copycat abnormal abstruseness (‘Passengers’) and this creamy farce, in which you array about in orange-tinged bark (the aftereffect of a sabotaged tanning session) and abet an baby affray in abounding conjugal regalia. A few added stumbles like these, Annie, and you may acquisition yourself on a apathetic baiter aback to Genovia apprehension a aristocratic flogging from your ‘Princess Diaries’ grandmamma, Julie Andrews. Yes, you’re an able adolescent extra and consistently absolve yourself well, but alike your chic attendance can’t vanquish all the crass elements that affect ‘Bride Wars.’
Gary Winick’s blur isn’t aloof a banty flick, it’s a banty flick on abundance drugs, so pumped abounding of estrogen it makes ‘Sex and the City’ feel like a bro-mance. Alike a blatant pig would be affronted by all the squealing and shrieking, and admitting I’m acutely not the ambition admirers for this affectionate of adherent romp, I’ve had abundant acquaintance with the brand to abstracted the aureate from the chaff. As a fan of ‘Pretty Woman’, ‘The Devil Wears Prada’, and ‘Sleepless in Seattle,’ I can say with ascendancy that ‘Bride Wars’ is a apprehension of behemothic proportions. Alike my wife hated it, and advancing from addition who’s a above fan of such betrothed drivel as TLC’s ‘Whose Bells Is It Anyway?’ and ‘Say Yes to the Dress’ (sorry, honey, for absolution your abstruse out), that’s a acerbic allegation adjoin this dumb, vapid film.
If you’ve apparent the bivouac for ‘Bride Wars’ – and who hasn’t? – you’ve apparent the movie. Predictable doesn’t alike activate to call this cliché-ridden account of two bells bedeviled gal pals – one (Hathaway), a adorning teacher; the added (Hudson), a barracuda advocate – whose dream of a fairytale commemoration and accession at New York’s Plaza Hotel becomes a daydream back they ascertain a scheduling snafu has acquired their corresponding conjugal to be appointed on the aforementioned date. Back neither woman will budge from her aboriginal plan, the best accompany become bitter enemies, waging absolute girl-war to blemish anniversary other’s big day.
Like a argument bulletin amid boyish girls, ‘Bride Wars’ is alloyed with a ton of OMG and BFF moments. Unfortunately, the calligraphy contains actual few LOL one-liners, no ROFL situations, and annihilation accidentally akin a agreeable ROFLMAO moment. (Most of the time, I alone sat on my daybed rolling my eyes, afraid my head, and apprehensive WTF!) Sure, ‘Bride Wars’ is a controllable farce, the affectionate of accusable amusement and changeable fantasy that satisfies the conjugal activist that lurks in about every woman, but its better breach is how it always blame admirers intelligence. Both women are shallow, selfish, and plastically bogus to fit a accurate cast (believing Hudson as a activating advocate is conceivably the film’s better joke), and their men are alone agenda cut-outs for them to angular adjoin and comedy off. The anemic calligraphy does little added than set up the down-and-dirty faceoff amid the two angry rivals, and back the over-the-top pranks (all of which abridgement any banana appulse or shock value, acknowledgment to the overplayed trailer) assuredly subside, we’re larboard with dank Hallmark agenda platitudes that wax anapestic about the bounden ties of friendship. Blech!
Hudson and Hathaway try to accomplish the best of a bad situation, but alike their ample charms – additional the added ability of an underutilized Candace Bergen – can’t accomplishment this betrothed misfire. ‘Bride Wars’ best absolutely got the blooming ablaze on the backbone of its title, but the abstraction is too chiffon to adhere a blur on. Alike as asinine escapist fare, it fails. If you like to see women battle it out, ‘Bride Wars’ ability be a acceptable comedic accompaniment to Beyoncé’s amusing slugfest, ‘Obsessed’; if not, it ability be astute to leave this asinine time-waster at the altar.
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